Wedding Speeches: Before or After the Meal?

Wedding Speeches: Before or After the Meal?

Here’s Why ‘After’ Wins Every Time at Tyn Dwr Hall

One of the questions we’re asked most often is:

“Should we do the speeches before the meal… or after?”

We totally understand why you might ask. Standing up in front of a room full of people can be daunting — and for the speech-givers, the temptation to “get it over with” early is real. But from years of experience hosting weddings here at Tyn Dwr Hall, we can confidently say:

Speeches work best after the meal.
Not just for us, or for the flow of the day — but for your guests, your catering, your photographs, and even for the speech-givers themselves (once the nerves pass!).

After the Meal: Why It Just Works

1. Everyone’s fed, watered, and in a great mood

Let’s be honest — listening to speeches while hungry isn’t easy. Your guests will have been on the go since morning and will be ready to sit, eat, and relax. Once they’ve had a delicious three-course meal (and maybe a glass of wine or two), they’re far more settled and ready to laugh, cry, and cheer you on.

2. The food stays perfect

We time and prepare every dish with love and precision. But if speeches happen first — and they run over (as they often do!) — that can disrupt service. No one wants their main course going cold in the kitchen because Uncle John added an extra 15 minutes reminiscing about your childhood.

3. It creates a natural flow into the evening

By finishing the meal with speeches, you naturally bridge the gap between the daytime and evening celebration. There’s no awkward lull, and it gives your guests time to digest before hitting the dancefloor (or enjoying the evening food!).

“But… what about the nerves?”

We hear you — it’s nerve-wracking standing up to speak in front of a room full of people.

But don’t lose sight of who’s in front of you:
It’s your family, your friends, your biggest supporters.
They’re not there to judge — they’re there to celebrate you.
And by doing the speeches after the meal, you’ll benefit from a more relaxed room, better energy, and (probably) a little liquid courage.

So take a deep breath, write it from the heart, and remember — they want you to do well.

What About Splitting the Speeches?

Some couples suggest breaking the speeches up — one before the meal, one between courses, and one after.

While it sounds like a way to ease the pressure, here’s the reality:

• It causes a stop-start feel to the meal

• It disrupts service and slows everything down

• It can be hard to keep guests’ attention across multiple intervals

• And, most importantly, it adds time to an already full day

Your guests are there to enjoy the flow, not feel like the meal’s being paused at every course.

Is It Really That Bad to Do Them First?

Not necessarily. Some couples do choose to get the speeches out of the way before the meal — especially if the speakers are nervous and feel they won’t enjoy their food otherwise. And we totally understand that.

If it helps calm the butterflies and lets you tuck into your dinner a little more peacefully, we’ll work with you to make it happen.

But here’s the honest truth:

• It doesn’t make the nerves disappear — you’re still standing up in front of everyone, and doing it hungry doesn’t always help!

• Guests may be distracted or restless, especially if they’ve not eaten fully since breakfast

• The room doesn’t have the same energy as it does after a couple of courses and a glass of wine

• And most importantly, we never know how long speeches will take — we say 15 minutes per speaker, but once the mic’s in someone’s hand… anything can happen! That’s a real risk when food is waiting.

So is it really that bad?
No — but it’s not ideal. And more often than not, couples say afterwards that they’re glad they waited.

Our Advice

Keep things simple.
Enjoy your meal. Then enjoy your speeches.

It’s a format that works beautifully, time and time again — and it sets the tone for the evening in exactly the right way.

Of course, if you really want to break the mould, we’re happy to chat it through. But from our perspective (and trust us, we’ve seen a lot of weddings!), post-meal speeches are the most enjoyable, efficient, and stress-free option of all.